How to disappear completely.

I find it interesting and sad that I can pack up and leave.
I'm proud of my courage to leave it all behind.
Yet, I'm still here.
So what does that say?

Perhaps it is those who think they are tough that are actually the weakest.
Maybe my thoughts persuade my heart.

Maybe actions really do speak louder than words....

Nostalgic.

How gorgeous is this image?

It makes me feel -

something I fear I had forgotten to experience.

---

I haven't felt much like myself lately.

I have an unfulfilled desire for the "better days," and I have to continually remind mysel that yes,

I DID have better days.

If anybody could have saved me it would have been you.

"You cannot find peace by avoiding life"
- Virgina Woolf

.

Her suicide followed a note she left for her husband which stated:

"I feel certain that I am going mad again. I feel we can't go through another of those terrible times. And I shan't recover this time. I begin to hear voices, and I can't concentrate. So I am doing what seems the best thing to do. You have given me the greatest possible happiness. You have been in every way all that anyone could be. I don't think two people could have been happier 'til this terrible disease came. I can't fight any longer. I know that I am spoiling your life, that without me you could work. And you will I know. You see I can't even write this properly. I can't read. What I want to say is I owe all the happiness of my life to you. You have been entirely patient with me and incredibly good. I want to say that — everybody knows it. If anybody could have saved me it would have been you. Everything has gone from me but the certainty of your goodness. I can't go on spoiling your life any longer. I don't think two people could have been happier than we have been. V."

Mad World.

All around me are familiar faces

Worn out places, worn out faces

Bright and early for their daily races

Going nowhere, going nowhere

And their tears are filling up their glasses

No expression, no expression

Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow

No tomorrow, no tomorrow

And I find it kind of funny

I find it kind of sad

The dreams in which I'm dying

Are the best I've ever had

I find it hard to tell you

Because I find it hard to take

When people run in circles

It's a very, very

Mad World.
- Gary Jules ( Tears for Fears cover )

How sweet it is (to be loved by you)

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to just love,

and be loved in return.

A Happy Interior.

I truly feel that waking up here,

here,

or here,

would guarantee much happier days.

It's time to make some changes.

Personal space is important,

& unfortunately,

a house isn't always a home...

Truth.

"The smartest people in the world are those who know how to be Happy."

Oh, the 60's.

"In the 60's hippies were a minority...Main stream America was innocent and trusted the government. Hippies were considered care free, poor beggars, dirty and not intelligent. Side doors were to keep them out of sight from the general public, because they'd create a stir among the straights".

Fantastic.

This haunts me,

terribly.

'nuff said.

Lake George.

Lake George

is stunning.

the cloud's casting shadows.

our boat ride.

With each visit to Lake George
we radiate with appreciation for the simplicity of this place.
From this, friends, I hope you learn to elimate unnecessary ornamentation from
your lives, as I most certainly have.

How wonderful that a physical appeal has been so much more
than just easy on the eyes.

Nature, (rogers)rock on.

[ .hahaha. had to, guys ]

.Security.

The font reminds me of a Ford advertisement,

well, and the dirt road tire marks, too,

but besides the irrelevant side note;

it makes me smile.

-------

"Ford, built tough."

The picture

could make for a good advertisement if you ask me.

Come to learn, "find some beautiful place to get lost"

are lyrics from Elliot Smith.

"I've been outside

Invited in

But I couldn't abide

Wouldn't miss it again

Burning every bridge that I cross

To find some beautiful place to get lost

I had true love

I made it die

I pushed her away

She said please stay

Burning every bridge that I cross

To find some beautiful place to get lost

To find some beautiful place to get lost

Well I don't know where I'll go now

And I don't really care who follows me there

But I'll burn every bridge that I cross

And find some beautiful place to get lost

And find some beautiful place to get lost"

(9:31:12 PM): maybe do a blog? so you can share your black sheep uniqueness with the world

AnGeL 909 (9:19:32 PM): and then...... the paranoia began.
AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:20:28 PM): So. im in my kitchen eating, and my cat is being so god damn annoying. Honestly i am the biggest animal lover in america but when my cat meows or my dog barks i want to kill someone ( holy shit, are animal sounds one of my pet peeves? ) So... im not paying attention to him bc i am totally focused on my food
AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:20:53 PM): and he is on the table with me, and then all of a sudden i see him jump off the table and he has something in his mouth, and he runs down stairs.
AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:21:23 PM): Now, I, automatically assume that it is a mouse that he got off the table ( that i was eating on ) and i automatically assume that the mouse was in the cereal box of the cereal that i was eating
AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:22:05 PM): So im like holy shit , how do i get the mouse out of his mouth ( now, this is all because of a previous mouse incident that ended up with me calling my neighbor at 3 in the morning hyserical bc my cat had a mouse in his mouth )

(9:22:21 PM): aahhahahha (9:22:28 PM): you got me cracking up over here

AnGeL 909 (9:22:43 PM): So.. I was like fuck that, I am just gonna shut the door and sleep upstairs. but then i realize i need my cell phone bc i need my alarm for the morning, so i RUN downstairs and run as fast as i can to get my cell phone amd i slam the door and end the night in my mothers room in her bed
AnGeL (9:23:40 PM): So, i wake up in the morning and it took me a min to realize why i was in my mothers room, and then im like FUCK im gonna walk downstairs and find a dead mouse like on my bed, soo.. i creep downstairs cuz i gotta get all my work stuff and i see my cat, and THEN! i see him grab something and run
AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:23:57 PM): and im like shittttttttttttt. So i call him over and he comes to me and drops..........

(9:24:07 PM): your stories are always priceless..and in great detail lol

AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:24:20 PM): the god damn plastic thingie that u have to twist of off the milk container.. like the plastic that holds the lid on
AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:24:24 PM): thats all it was!
AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:24:35 PM): that whole time. it was the milk thingie
(9:24:37 PM): so you were just high and somehow pictured a mouse?
AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:24:40 PM): Yes lol
(9:24:50 PM): how do you know it wasnt a mouse and the cat hid it somewhere in your room? lol
AnGeL KiSsEs 909 (9:25:15 PM): why on earth would u tell me that lol